simple changes

While I'm out in the garden, I often think of things I'd like to say here.  Something about the open sky unhinges my locked up thoughts.  I need to bring a little notebook with me and a stub of pencil to remember them though, for by the time I reach the house again, they've all flown away.  Words are like that, slippery and eager for escape.  

In May, we passed into twenty-two years of marriage.  Long enough now that we often arrive at the same places unexpectedly and unknowingly, each of us coming to the other with a plan and excited to find the other was thinking just the same thing.  Such unity mystifies me, a mystery.  

We sat around a fire one night and discovered we both are ready to simplify things.   Modern lives become cluttered so quickly; uncluttering them is nearly a spiritual discipline.   Letting go of complications is a wonderful feeling of freedom.

~I went through my books and made a stack of things that I don't want to read for awhile:  theology and issues and complex ideas. (I've got nature books, poetry and Miss Read for now.)  

~We quit spending.  Instead of convoluted budgets and plans, we just decided to quit spending extra money.  I took out less cash than I thought we needed, left debit and credit cards at home and decided to live on that.  It's fun, actually.  A kind of daily adventure to see how we can make things work and what we can do without.  

~I simplified our food and went back to a mostly vegetarian menu.  No more worrying about where our meat came from or convoluted food politics.  No more wrestling with the inequities of a high-cost protein diet in light of the suffering of the rest of the world.  Beans, rice, veggies: simple.  And liberating.

~We didn't make the long drive to the city for church last month.  We visited the little Episcopal church down the road instead.  There were perhaps forty people, mostly over 50 years old.  It was a little like walking into a Father Tim novel: kind of wonderful and unexpectedly beautiful.

~I don't watch the news, switched off NPR and turned on classical music instead.  I pretty much dropped out of Facebook and Instagram (they will be there if I get the urge to return). And I'm only writing and reading when I truly have time and desire.  Pretty much everything a writer is NOT to do.  But I'm happier and more at rest.  Less complicated, for sure.

Today I have some more currants to pick, and the rhubarb....the rhubarb...maybe another few bags of pie filling for the freezer.  I've decided on a whole row of hydrangeas along the fence line.  It will take me awhile to buy them all, but today I've got a lovely one to plant.  Maybe next week I can pick up another.  There are weeds taking over the strawberry bed and the little ducks really need to get out into their swimming pool.  The dogs should be brushed and the lawn mowed and I need to pick a bouquet of the wild pink flowers on the back path before they all disappear.  Best get to work now.

much love.

tonia